A Motley Crue love story…
In the beginning, what was this thing?
All of a sudden, I could find anything
It was a birth, it was a death,
It was the beginning of the internet
Things that were far, were now very near
I dove in like a kid in a pool
Even though I didn’t know how to swim
I had to do it just to be cool
I wasn’t sure exactly what to do
But my heart and my fingers knew,
They went straight to Motley Crue,
I could not believe there were others too
Too fast for love, theater of pain
Shout at the Devil, Knock em dead
It was to much for my fucking brain.
My fingers knew, I became Cruehead
I knew I was probably insane
Found my tribe on the shout board,
Was always a weirdo,Â
Now I was fucking adored
It was like I was born again,
Was a weirdo, but now Cruehead,
Public enemy # 1
I read every fucking single thread
Then somehow IRC
This was all new to me
But I found where I belonged,
Living in a fucking Motley Crue song
Everyone was just like me
Fucked up and just trying to be
I was blind but now I see
Was this really happening to me?
I lived just to log on
Cranking a fucking Motley song
Fuck the haters and hangers on
Cruehead is what I be
They thought I was so hardcore
I was a fucking Motley Crue whore,
Bashed them that be bashing me,
Fuck the haters, this was war
One hater, let’s call him Axlrod,
He was a worthy adversary,
Everytime he posted hate,
I would shut that fucking troll downÂ
Shout board, IRC
Was a beautiful thing to see
It was the place for me
The only place I felt free
One day got a message from Heywannaplay
Said we both can see
Didn’t know exactly what to say
Wasn’t sure if they be a dude or a babe
She sent a pic
Said no fucking way
Showed my buddy
Dude said, no fucking way
But we started to chat all the time
Like every minute of every day
Fell in love with digital words
I can’t believe this was happening to me
Then she called me on the fucking phone
I was floored didn’t know what to say
Hey girl you took it offline
But she really sounded fucking fine
Started talking everyday
Her voice melted me from far away
She was crazy
Just like me
It was so uncharted territoryÂ
We didn’t care
We did it anyway
Following our hearts anywhere
I never met anyone like me
I be fucking crazy
She said I want to come visit you
I be like, no fucking way
She booked a flight
We both be fucking cray
At this time this was crazy
But love does what it may
Picked her up in my crap car
Thing didn’t even have a stereo
I had a ghetto blaster in the backseat
Didn’t seem that weird to me
We were a little awkward at first
Had a single rose, still wearing dockers from work
She had on leopard print pants
Looking way more Motley than me
I don’t remember what we said
Got to hotel smoked a million cigs
I really had no game
I never did, never needed one
Nice Mullet, kinda the same as now,
Great hair, but still got no game
Never had one all my life never even tried, why fuck with things if they already be fly?
We smoked a pile of cigs, fucked, listened to Crue and watched porno flicks
Who was this fucking chick? Talked about getting married the very next day, probably should have in retrospect
But it was all so fucking crazy
Way more to come…this was before like Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan, you’ve got mail…I knew of no one who ever had an internet romance…especially over the love of Motley Crue
It was crazy as fuck, but so fucking cool…there is a perfect ending to this fucking tale…